The Road Less Traveled
by shamarie26
Summary: First person point of view told by Rin. She is now 23 and ready to take life into her own hands. This story is set in Fedual Era Japan.
1. Prologue

The Road Less Traveled February 9, 2016

 **Prologue**

Felt like years we had been walking, Lord Sesshomaru leading every step of the way. Jaken following ever so closely less he get lost. But I was trailing behind. Thoughts cluttered my mind as my feet moved repetitiously. Absentmindedly my fingers clutched A-Un's reins. Fifteen years I have spent following Lord Sesshomaru. Deep into forests, out in the open, up over mountains, down deep in valleys, fighting Inuyasha, defeating Naraku, interacting with his mother. The list is endless. I am pleased to note that Sesshomaru-sama has grown these few years. Not physically of course. Still the same long silver hair, same magenta stripes, same cyan crested moon, same stoic porcelain face, same expressionless eyes. Well not totally expressionless. They only seem to covey anger, irritated, and boredom. A-Un nudges me in the back. I cease my wondering mind to look up. It seems my feet have stopped moving and ahead of me the road splits into two. I wish I could say that one side was brightly lit illuminating the correct path. I wish I could say the trees were different and that the ground looked better on one side. The fact is that they both looked exactly the same. A-Un nudges me to the left. Sesshomaru-sama must have went in that direction, still I hesitate. Fifteen years I have blindly and wordlessly followed Lord Sesshomaru without hesitation or question. Fifteen years I have spent watching as he searched for whatever it was that drove him onward. Fifteen years I have followed gaily and blissfully just happy to be in his presence. Unaware that life could be anything else. Well that all comes to a halt today. This very moment! Because now Rin is searching for something myself. I drop A-Un's reins and step towards the right path. I wish I could say destiny whispered my name on the wind. I wish I could say I was more sure right now than anything else in my life including following Sesshomaru-sama, but the truth was that I was scared. Had no earthly idea where I was and an even less idea of where I was going. All I knew was that I wasn't going to grow old and die having followed wordlessly the rest of my life. With only picking flowers as my skill. So I shook the jitters from my body and headed onto the right path, deep into the forest.


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Three sunsets later saw me finally at a river. They aren't hard to track unless it has been raining. A-Un scared the crap out of me causing me to turn around quickly with my o tanto. That was two nights ago. I guess he didn't want me wondering off by myself. He follows me silently. Kind of makes me feel like Sesshomaru-sama. The thought brings a touch of a smile to my lips. I somber up as I undress. I gently lay my orange kimono folded on a rock. It is light orange that fades into crème at my knees and wrists. Large white flowers gather at my hem. They grow smaller in a diagonal motion as they reach my pale pink obi. Small pink and red flowers accent the large white ones. The same goes for my arms. Only the flowers rise up to my elbow on my right arm. The white flowers travel up my left arm though, right across my left shoulder and a bit down the front. When Sesshomaru-sama first presented it to me I fell in love with it. Maybe because the silk is so nice, maybe because orange is my favorite color. I constantly tell myself it is not because it looks like I have a mokomoko too. That would be foolish. I scoff at the idea that I could be a demon. I tell myself to get serious and stop thinking about Lord Sesshomaru while changing my red Haneri for a thin white one. I wade into the water waist high. A-Un settles down close enough that water laps up his sides as he is laying. Even with A-Un near I keep a hand on my o tanto. It has a thirteen-and-a-half-inch blade. Orange ribbon encases the handle. Lord Sesshomaru was none too pleased to discover Kagome had given it to me. I believe his exact words were "That stupid mutt and his wench." I snorted at the memory causing A-Un to look up at me. "Nothing." I answer and he promptly lays his head back down in the water. Cleaning myself quickly I hasten out of the water and replace my Haneri with a red one. I start a fire and go off to collect some fish.

I have both my feet in the water, my Haneri rolled up, and bent at the waist trying to catch a Chinook Salmon. It's a slippery little thing, but I learned a trick after watching a few fishermen fail. I set up a small net attached to two long wooden stakes. I scare the fish into the net, and pull the draw string. Pretty impressive right? I know. Except I didn't plan on a red headed woman to be screaming and running out of the forest to my left. A-Un and I immediately jump into action. She stops and turned around to face the demon. A boar demon. This one has an armored plate on his chest (more like a gut) and a metal helmet. He was grunting on all fours but stood up on his hind legs. Fat stubby hands reached out to grab the woman and drool dripped out of his mouth. Not the cute little dribble of a baby. No, this was fat nasty globs dripping down his chin. This thing stood seven feet high and five feet wide. A roar comes out of his mouth, yet I don't betray my fear. He starts to charge at her. I run behind him to strike him in the back. I manage to only give him a thin cut on his calf. He turns around more irritated than hurt. His breath is bitter and he raises a fist. My eyes widen in terror. My heart hammers in my chest. I start to panic. Let's face it. I'm no Kagome with spiritual powers. No Inuyasha with demonic powers or a Tessaiga. And to even compare to Lord Sesshomaru has to be the greatest joke ever told. Behind the boar as he steadily advances on me (more like staggering really) I hear a bit of chanting. The wind picks up around me whipping my hair into a frenzy. Then leaves, hundreds, no thousands of them come flying at me and the boar. I clutched my o tanto to my chest by the handle with my blade pointed skyward. I squeeze my eyes shut and hope and pray and then hope some more. I hear the boar squealing, still stumping, and then silence. Blissful silence. I chance a peak. I squint my right eye open. I don't see the boar so I completely open both of my eyes to survey my surroundings. I immediately notice the boar deteriorating. Surrounding trees have leaves stuck in the bark. A few branches have been scattered. I look up in awe.

I am even more surprised to recognized the woman adjusting her skirt. "Ayame." I stammer. Her head jerks in my direction. She looks confused. "It's me, Rin." She walks into arm's length to smell the air. "It certainly is. I can smell Sesshomaru." Her lack of friendly greeting annoys me. We aren't the best of friends, barely even acquaints but still. I did just try to help her. Didn't really help much but still. Her lack of honorific for Lord Sesshomaru bites too. I shove that deep. Tucking some hair behind my ear, I walk over to collect my things from the rock. As I pass her I hear "What was that pink thing?" "Not sure." I throw over my shoulder. I find A-Un waiting for me by the rock. Ayame bounces up behind me. "You must have some idea." "No, not really." "One does not simply produce a pink translucent shield without knowing how." She has moved around me to the other side of the rock with an eyebrow raised. I sigh. Is this how Lord Sesshomaru feels with all the unnecessary questions? I shrug "Not sure how it happened. One day Kadae presented it to me before she passed. Then When _Lord_ Sesshomaru came for me Kagome blessed it. Truthfully I have no idea what it does." The more I explain it the more confused I become myself. "I have a question of my own. Why are you out here fighting boars?" She sits down on my rock. "I was distracted, and just bumped into him." Now I have an eyebrow raised. What could be weighing so heavily on her mind that she didn't notice a seven-foot boar demon. I don't voice my thoughts though. Years in Lord Sesshomaru's presence has taught me to keep my questions to myself. Life has an uncanny way of answering you. I return to the river. As I am setting up my fish trap again then my stomach growls. Ayame's soon follows. She is in the water helping me now and we both chuckle. Once enough fish is gathered we head back to camp. I rekindle the fire while Ayame skewer the fish. The breeze blows gently and we roast the fish. We settle into an easy silence. I get comfortable and lean back against A-Un. I listen to the fire crackle until sleep over takes me.


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I am startled awake. I jerk my head to look around. The fire has since burned out. Nothing but ashes left in the pit I dug hours ago. I stand to stretch. Reaching my arms above my head I yawn. I thoroughly look around a second time. Ayame is nowhere to be seen. The only signs that I didn't conjure her up in my imagination are the fish sticks and the scattered branches. I fully dress in my orange kimono and get A-Un ready. The journey is a long one, made so because I still have no idea where I'm going. I do know that I am heading east. I can tell by the sunrise. I keep to the thick foliage of the trees as time passes. Eyes and ears alert for more demons. After last night two things become abundantly clear. One, I am a terrible fighter. Like I suck…...greatly! Two, Sesshomaru-sama isn't here. I should have realized that when I struck off on my own. It just became more glaring since I can't fight. I lead A-Un mindlessly. I am honest enough to admit that I'm hoping to come up on a village. I need to see people. And if it isn't too much to ask I would like to encounter a warrior to learn from. I send the silent pray to whatever gods are listening and takes pity on fools. My eyes widen suddenly. I look straight ahead so not to make any sudden movements. Something is following. The animals are silent. Not the silence that comes with a sense of calm and peace. This silence raises the hair on the back of my neck. This silence only come from fear. Where your breath is trapped in lungs too constricted to move. Where your blood starts to drain and panic sets in. I utterly refuse to cower. I head into a thicker group of trees to my left. I tuck behind a tree and reach for my o tanto. A-Un doesn't join me. Something seem to have caught his attention. I feel a subtle touch on my right shoulder. It is as if something has landed there. I squint an eye open. And there, right there, on my shoulder is a spider! I scream. I jump away from the tree and A-Un has come running. I jump around like a fool but I don't care! There as a spider on me and I want it gone. Like…... yesterday. I am out of oxygen by now but I gear up again and let off another piercing scream. I run and throw my arms around one of A-Un's heads.

"Rin." A-Un bends his neck to nudge me. He sends out a soothing vibrations. But I can't decide which is worse. That there was a spider or that I am hallucinating. "Rin." Yep I am hallucinating because that sounds like Lord Sesshomaru. "Stupid girl Lord Sesshomaru is calling you." Smack. I lift my head. Only one person could have a voice so irritable. And more importantly only one person I know of has a voice that flows like water. Smooth and boundless. I take a deep breath and turn around. I stare long and hard. My eyes devour him. He looks… He looks…... I geared myself up trying to describe what I am seeing but it is the same. He looks the same. What he doesn't look like is someone who has missed me, someone who been searching the world over to find me. Dramatic I know but still I can't help it. I am disappointed that he is so unaffected. Sadden that he can just continue without me. I dig deep for that defiance I had not too long ago when I first ventured off and I square my shoulders. I make eye contact "Sesshomaru-sama." By this time Jaken manages to pick himself up off the ground. His mouth is gaping at my audacity. He is stunned. I am too but I need him to see me as an equal. Regardless that I am lost, regardless that I can't fight, regardless that I was just running scared, regardless that I look crazy with leaves in my hair. He needs to understand that we are equals.

Equals. It sounded so much better in my head. Sounded like I had a point. The truth couldn't be father. Sesshomaru-sama is a demon, a pure demon while I am a human. He has got lightning fast reflexes and heightened senses. He is able to heal quickly given certain circumstances and has an incredible lifespan. I have none of these. In fact, I can't even compare to Kagome-chan right now, but I will. And it is that determination that allows me to grit my teeth and look him in the eyes. Jaken squeals again "You. You. You will show the proper respect to Lord Sesshomaru." He stutters a bit and gets really flustered. Then Jaken charges at me. I can't believe that this little green, toad looking imp is charging at me. I get into my best fighting stance. And it isn't much. Just something I've seen Kagome-chan do. Mine is a very loose version because I'm not sure of the exact pose. Half way to me Jaken scream and falls forwards. I look up to Sesshomaru-sama to see him putting away his green poison whip. We lock eyes again. I get the feeling he is measuring me up. I am not brave enough to ask how I did but I will ask this. "Lord Sesshomaru, I would like you to teach me how to fight." I know, the honorific is back, but I can't help it. Decades of a habit. I wait painstakingly for his reply. Or his normal lack of reply that still involves doing what I asked.


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The wind blowing gently combs through my hair. I hold my fish stick carefully having just plucked it from the fire. I take slow careful bites. Jaken is mumbling to himself about the stupidity of humans. I sigh. I would have to agree after what I did earlier. Man, I am so stupid it is a wonder Sesshomaru-sama didn't take my head off. Speaking of my lord I lift my head to gaze at him through my lashes. He is sitting against a tree. His left leg is bent up with his arm resting on it. His head is tilted back with his eyes closed. Regardless how relaxed he looks I know he is still alert. I lean back against A-Un. He rumbles contently. I lift my eyes towards the sky. The sun is painting the clouds a coral color as it sets. The sky itself is has twinges of purple to it. I allow my mind to wonder. It unmistakably wonders back to a time not long ago where I lost all sanity.

" _Lord Sesshomaru I would like you to teach me how to fight." While waiting I stared long and hard. Looking at what many people would describe as a face of perfection. Pointed ears which aren't too long or too short. Just right for tucking hair behind. Speaking of hair, his silver bangs brush his eyelids. Crested purple moon rest on his forehead and twin magenta strips on each cheek. His mouth is formed into a straight line. He is almost frowning, almost. It's not the mouth that conveys emotion. In fact, Lord Sesshomaru says little. It's the eyes, molten gold eyes that are ever watching. My chocolate orbs snap back to those eyes in particular. I've got to get pass the indifference that lurks at the surface. It is not directed towards me often but when it is directed towards me it makes me grind my teeth. A-Un walks over to Lord Sesshomaru. The left head looks him in the eyes as if waiting for approval. The right head looks over his shoulder at me. He seems torn. I know the feeling well. Half of me is joyous to see Lord Sesshomaru again. I'm even a little giddy. The other half, the one needing validation, can't believe I haven't had more time to progress. I groan in my throat. A-Un returns to me. I can feel his concern radiating from his body. Like his true master, he doesn't say much. Maybe that is why they are so compatible. We continue to face off. Sesshomaru-sama and I. I'll admit that my confidence is deteriorating. I am starting to feel a bit of defeat. Lord Sesshomaru doesn't say anything. He just turns smoothly on his heels and walks away. It hurt that he will just walk away from me. Jaken begins to laugh but I don't take my eyes from Lord Sesshomaru's retreating form. "Ha!" Jaken's voice is irritable. "You think the great Lord Sesshomaru has the time to fool around with you?" Tears well into my eyes. They are tears of frustration that I refuse to allow to fall. Pride is everything. I've had no better teacher than Lord Sesshomaru. I struggle to compose myself. Wondering how to get him to take me seriously I take calming breaths. A-Un nudges me in the back to follow after Lord Sesshomaru and Jaken. I feel a sense of déjà vu settle over me. I can simply follow Lord Sesshomaru and pretend that I never strayed from him to begin with. I can keep my head down and continue to follow wherever he might lead. I will continue to receive all the benefit that being his ward affords me. Beautiful silk kimonos, playing in flower fields, and never really accomplishing anything. Okay, that's not a fair assessment but it's how I feel. Like Lord Sesshomaru's pet. Second option would be to do what I did already. Strike out on my own. Again. I know that it didn't turn out exactly as I had planned but maybe I need to give it another go. I hear Lord Sesshomaru's footfalls fade. If I turn around now I might be able to reach another village by night fall. The more I think about that idea the easier it is for me to discard it. I was stifled in Kaede's village until Sesshomaru-sama rescued me. He gave me a choice and I haven't looked back since. Which brings me to where I am now. I need more than what I am getting and if Sesshomaru-sama can't give it to me then I need to go find it. I close my eyes and breathe deeply through my mouth to calm my nerves. I know what I must do but it doesn't make it any easier. In fact, it makes it harder. I force myself to feel a calmness that really isn't there. I send a quick prayer for my life. I open my eyes and unsheathe my o tanto. I gripped it tightly and when A-Un nudges me a second time I take off._

 _I dash after Lord Sesshomaru as fast as my kimono will allow. I've got one shot to get through him before my nerves gets the best of me. One chance to get this right before he kills me. And I mean dead dead. Really dead. Like never coming back to life again dead. I see Sesshomaru-sama ahead of me in another clearing of trees. I hear A-Un pounding the ground behind me. My heart is hammering in my chest like a warrior's drum. Adrenaline is coursing through my veins. It mixes with fear into a heady combination. I raise my o tanto as I get closer to Sesshomaru-sama. I focus on him and I can feel my o tanto getting warm. A beam of pale pink something shoots out of the tip. I slow up to try to warn Lord Sesshomaru. I feel the world slow down around me. Sesshomaru-sama looks a little over his right shoulder. I know he knows I am approaching him. Then as soon as my o tanto fires he is no longer in front of me. The poor tree is scorched though. I come skidding to a stop. I'm breathing so heavily. I look around as I catch my breath. Lord Sesshomaru is nowhere to be seen. Jaken runs up to me. His face is so angry. I can hardly blame him. I can't believe I just attacked Lord Sesshomaru! I am stunned at my own actions. That I, Rin, would ever betray my lord in such a fashion. I close my eyes and groan as the weight of what I have done suffocates me. I just wanted him to take me seriously. Instead I rush after him like a deranged woman. "You stupid, stupid human. I told Lord Sesshomaru that you were worthless and never should have been saved." I open my eyes to look at Jaken as he spoke. I flinched at the words he spewed at me. They cut deep. The remind me that I am a traitor. I try to swallow but my throat is dry. I just attacked Lord Sesshomaru! I take no reprieve in the fact that Sesshomaru-sama heard me coming a mile away and dodged my attack. Jaken lifted his Nintojo to blast me with fire. I brace myself to fight Jaken. Jaken's Nintojo glows and I feel a rush of wind fly by me. Followed by a large breaking sound. My eyes widen considerably as Lord Sesshomaru stands in front of me. I peak around Lord Sesshomaru's back to find that Jaken has been implanted into a tree face first. I then glance up at my Lord. He's angry. It's in the tensed stance he has taken, in the deep breaths, and in the narrowing of his eyes._

" _Rin." I was so busy studying him that I didn't notice him looking back. "Hai." My voice cracks. I cleared my throat and repeated myself. "Hai Lord Sesshomaru." I straighten up as he turned around to face me. He leans into me as his eyes move across my face as if searching for something. They narrow when settling on my forehead. I self-consciously reach up to touch the spot he's looking at. I lock eyes with Sesshomaru-sama. I sucked in air. My heart kicks into gear. I can hear it in my ears. So I know that Sesshomaru-sama must hear it. His face is so close to mine that I can smell his breath. I feel a blush creep up my neck onto my face. I lick my lips. For some odd reason they dried up on me. Sesshomaru-sama straightens up and steps back. I feel the loss of his body heat immediately. Shaking my head, I know I need to pull myself together. "Lord Sesshomaru." I am pleased to find I don't sound as breathless as I feel. Having his complete attention is empowering and nerve wrecking. "I am serious." I state while maintaining eye contact. The silence stretches. I hate these pauses. They cause me to second guess myself. Cause me to feel unsure. Lord Sesshomaru walks past me. I can't believe he is walking away from me a second time. In the same day no less. I ball my fists up at my sides. Angry and confused. Maybe I should just punch him. Simply call his name and when he turns around just punch him right in the face. I huff and turn around after him. Before I can unleash the rage lurking beneath the surface I hear "Come." I am elated. I know it's silly but my eyes widen and I claps my hands in front of me. A huge grin takes over my face and I chase after Sesshomaru-sama. This time I do so joyfully. I run up behind him and hug him. I know. I hugged Lord Sesshomaru! I can't believe it. I know he is stunned because he is as stiff as a board but I don't care. All I care about is him taking me seriously. I press my face deeper into his Mokomoko. It's still the softest thing I have ever felt. I step closer to him with my hands around his waist. "Thank you." It comes out muffled in his back but I know he understands me. Strands of his hair tickles my ear and I release a giggle. "Rin." I know he wants me to let him go. I planned to but he feels good. Like really good. He smells good. I want to tell him but I know he won't appreciate the fresh grass comparison. "Rin." I hear my name again. I reluctantly let him go. My stomach growls between us. I step back and laugh. "We'll camp by the river." His voice soothes my nerves. I nod even though he isn't looking at me. I am starving. It's not every day a girl wakes up alone, is scared witless, attacks her Lord, and then practically jumps on his back. Lord Sesshomaru begins to walk away yet again but this time I am pleased. A-Un nudges me in the back. I send him my best smile. I don't know where he's been but he always shows up right on time. I follow my Lord earnestly._

The sounds on nocturnal animals shake me from my memories. I look down at my fish that is getting cold. A blush sneaks across my face when I think of how I blatantly grab Sesshomaru-sama. I sigh and look towards Jaken. He has finally fallen asleep. All the beating he has taken today must have surely taken a toll. I chance another glance Lord Sesshomaru's way. His eyes are still close and a few strands of hair float in the wind. "Sleep Rin." I'm not surprised that even with the fire burning low and night settling in that Sesshomaru-sama can still read me. Settling more comfortly against A-Un I drift off to sleep.


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Today is one of those rare days. The sun is just beginning to rise and take the chill off the wind. Today I have woken up before Sesshomaru-sama. I look around sharply. The fire has burned out. A-Un rumbles contently. I manage to stand. Working out the kinks in my body, I stretch my hands above my head. I quickly cover a yawn. Reaching down I grab my o tanto. Placing it in my mouth carefully. I proceed to grab my kimono at the knees. I tip toe towards Lord Sesshomaru as quietly as possible. I want to test him. I know crazy but hey, I don't want him to think I've given up. I take a careful step and then another. A rock that I accidently kick starts to move. I freeze and my eyes jump to Lord Sesshomaru. I hold my breath as I see if he heard anything. My shoulders drop in relief that he hasn't moved. I don't have to look towards Jaken, I can hear his snoring. It sounds very congested like he is sick. I resume my pacing. Slowly. Slowly. I chant over and over to myself. I have only just made it past the fire pit. I have about ten more steps to go. Sesshomaru-sama's silhouette is bathed in an orange light. I probably spent another ten minutes getting in front of Lord Sesshomaru. I release my kimono and stand at his feet looking down. He is still breathing evenly in the same position he was when I fell asleep.

Okay I will admit it. He's beautiful. The kind that women wish they could be. I know they must spend a fortune of skin products to get the smooth finish that comes naturally to his face. His lashes are thick while his eyebrows are thin. His silver hair looks glorious. I can't wait to touch it. I can't believe that he hasn't sensed my presence yet. A huge Cheshire grin breaks across my face. Maybe it is because we have been together for so long. It pleases me to know that Lord Sesshomaru considers me an extension of himself and is able to relax in my presence. I somber up when remembering that I am on a mission. I bend over Lord Sesshomaru. My right hand on the tree he is leaning against. In my left hand is my o tanto. I lean close to block out the sun. That is what I tell myself. Any other option I refuse to allow to enter my conscious. I lean closer still. At this point I am three inches from rubbing nose with Lord Sesshomaru. His lips distract me for a moment. My pulse run wildly like an untrained mustang. My hand is shaking as I raise my o tanto. I feel like beads of sweat is pouring down my forehead. I am going to try my hand at attacking Lord Sesshomaru again. I know yesterday didn't go as plan but this time I have caught Lord Sesshomaru with his guard down. Jaken groans. I look to my left to see him rolling over. I still myself completely as he settles once again. I let out a breath. Relief floods my veins. I turn my head back and my chocolate orbs clash with golden ones.

Oh shit, I cringe. I know Lord Sesshomaru would kill Inuyasha to know I picked up the bad word from him, but hey in this position what other words come to mind? I hold steady. Closing my eyes, I count to ten. _One_. I should just pretend it didn't happen. _Two_. Turning away right now sounds like a good idea. _Three_. There is no way on Earth that Sesshomaru-sama is going to forget this. _Four_. "Rin." There's that voice is again. I melt and shiver. I need to think of something quick. Because when his breath caresses my face a second time it will be time to pay the piper. _Five_. Another deep breath. Why do people say to do this? It's not really that calming. I feel as if I'm a gasp away from hyperventilating. _Six_. This is it Rin pull yourself together. You didn't come over here for nothing. _Seven_. What's the worst that could happen? He wouldn't actually kill me! At least I don't think he would. Not after how many times he went to save me. A voice nags in the back of my mind that those things happened before I tried to attack Lord Sesshomaru _again_. I shove that deep where it belongs. With the other things I refuse to acknowledge. _Eight_. "Rin." There it is again. Hypnotic and enticing. Now or never Rin, now or never. I breath out. _Nine_. I go in for the kill. I open my eyes and dig my right hand into his hair. Feels much silkier than the bark it clutched moments before. Sesshomaru-sama's eyes widen. And at the same time I moved my hand, he moved his. He shoves us to the ground faster than I thought possible. It's a wonder I haven't hit my head.

Leaves fall around us. I am lying on my back, chest rising and falling rapidly, and lips parted to take in what little air seems to be available. The sun is glowing behind Lord Sesshomaru. Some filter through the strands of his hair that surrounds us like a shimmering curtain. I lick my lips nervously. I tried to lift my left arm but it's pinned to the ground. Sesshomaru has it bent at the elbow above my head. Holding me by my wrist he ensures that not only is he not touching my o tanto but it's facing in the opposite direction. I test my hand. Yep, securely pinned down. My left hand is amazingly free though. Okay I'm lying. I am gripping a few stands of his hair. I bunch some of it in my hands. If I am going to die I plan to get my fill of playing with it first. Okay I have gained sufficient courage to drag my eyes up to his. They are narrowed but hey what else is new? I take another chance. I know at this point I must not really like life, but rest assured that I do. I just refuse to live passively one moment longer. Man, have I told you about his hair. I'm still running my fingers through the strands. It smells good. And it shines. Like crystals. The way the sun is hitting, man I just want to cut a piece off and save it. That would really get me killed. Before I commit to anything _that_ reckless I first need to get out of this mess. But how to explain this Rin? Not sure I tripped and fell is going to work. Note to self, next time have an excuse.

"Lord Sesshomaru, good morning." He raises an eyebrow. I would have too had the situation been reversed. "Rin." Yea, I know. You're waiting for an explanation. I just don't have one. None that would be believable anyway. So since I started on this path I might as well continue it. "Lord Sesshomaru, I thought we might train today." There. I said it. I feel pleased with my response. So pleased in fact I'm grinning. I sounded poised and sure of myself. Because I do this kind of thing every day. Totally not out of character. "Is that what you thought?" Five words that completely wipe the smile from my face. My lips form a tight line. Yes! That is what I thought, but I know better than to push too far too soon. I am going to die. I just know it. Because seconds later I lift one of my legs to knee him, and he rolls us. I fall flat against him. I scramble to all fours as quickly as this stupid kimono allows. So now Sesshomaru is sitting up. Looking down at me. His right hand still clutches my left wrist, holding my fist to the ground. I cannot move it to save my life. O tanto still facing the wrong way. My hand that was in his hair is now gripping his shirt. It's cool to the touch but that is betraying because there is hard and hot flesh underneath it. If I thought being beneath Sesshomaru-sama was intoxicating, then being above him is deceptive. It gives the illusion that you have power. That you have some semblance of control. I look at my hand clutching his shirt. He has a hand wrapped around that wrist too. Long slender fingers that hold me tightly. Not too tightly but I am under no impression that I can move away willingly. His nails aren't overly sharp but I remind myself that they are capable of becoming poisonous at any given moment.

"Rin." I hate the way he says my name like a sentence. It's a proper noun to hear Kagome tell it. Whatever that means. "What are you doing?" The question floats softly to my ears. I raise my eyes to his. "I thought you were sleeping." I say equally as softly. I allow my eyes to wonder over his shoulder. "Is that what you thought?" Why does every question he asks seem to denounce my intelligence? I refuse to fold. "That _is_ what I thought." My eyes crash into his. I try to explain. Not excuse but explain. "I thought you were asleep, and I wanted to test my-" "By attacking me?" He cuts me off. I raise an eyebrow. Is the great Lord Sesshomaru amusing himself at my expense? "Well it's not like I succeeded." I admit to myself. "Well you were just sleeping there." I begin again. "I was sleeping?" He repeats. "And I wanted to surprise you." I continue. "Surprise me?" "And so the idea came to me." "You thought this was a good idea?" I can hear his amusement. "You know Lord Sesshomaru, I won't get through a sentence with your continued interruptions." He nods his head as a sign for me to continue. "As I was saying. I did think it a good idea to start the morning with some training. But you were sleeping and I wanted to see how far I could get. And to tell you the truth I got pretty far actually." I smile to myself. I manage to sneak up on him quite effortlessly. "I manage to do the unthinkable because you-" I pause. The more I think about it the more unthinkable it really is. How did I sneak up on Lord Sesshomaru? He's a full blooded daiyokai and I could never sneak up on Inuyasha. My eyes widen. "I didn't sneak up on you did I?" Sesshomaru-sama stared back as if weighing his words carefully. "No." How can such a simple word carry such wealth of meaning? Of course not. I probably sounded like a boar coming to him. I hang my head. Back to square one. I must have looked so stupid trying to keep quite. And for what? I should have just bum-rushed him. I snap my head up with the realization "then why didn't you say something? Why pretend to be sleep?"

I wait for his answer, searching his eyes like a mad woman. "Curious." Okay, I will take curious. At least it wasn't boredom. I beam at him. "Well great." "Great?" "Yes great. Because for a minute there I thought you would kill me." I say it so softly because I was truly nervous for a moment there. I move to back up and Lord Sesshomaru lets go of both of my wrist. I stand at complete height. Sesshomaru-sama now towers me. I turn and retreat to A-Un to gather my belongings needed for a bath. "Well," I say more for my benefit. "I'm going to bathe." A pebble is thrown at Jaken. "Hai!" He jumps up expectedly. "My Lord?" Jaken rubs sleep from his eyes. "Clean up." I don't look over my shoulder to see what happening, instead I gather A-Un's reigns and take him with me. We walk to the river where I unload him. I shed my orange kimono leaving only my crème Haneri. Grabbing my soap, I wade into the water. A-Un had waded with me. I guess he feels dirty too. "What's next?" I ask myself. The left head nudges my hand with the soap. I chuckle a little. "I know that silly. I mean with Lord Sesshomaru. I'm not sure what I am going to do next. He just stands there expecting me to come up with another plan. Is this how Lord Sesshomaru feels? Always expected to have all the answers? But honestly. It does seem as if he has all the answers. I wash A-Un and then myself. I must return to Kagome to get more of this liquid soap. It is really convenient. Drying off near our stuff I put on a yellow Yukata. It's a summer kimono. Light and airy. My pale yellow Yukata is lightly dusted in Ume flowers which is said to mean faithfulness and pure of heart. I just enjoy how pink they are. I have wooden sandals on. Lord Sesshomaru said he didn't want me to hurt my feet. I tie my hair up in a messy bun with a pink silk ribbon to get it off my neck. It will get hot and knowing Lord Sesshomaru we will be walking for quite some time. All A-Un did was shake his mane. I lead us back to the camp site. "Oh Rin, there you are. Come before Lord Sesshomaru leaves us." Jaken has cleared the campsite and now holds his Nintojo. I pack up A-Un with the rest of our belongings and grab his reigns.

"Lord Sesshomaru." I began as I fall into step with him. "When will we visit Inuyasha and the others?" I really need to ask Kagome a few things and I want to know how everyone is doing. It has been awhile. And by awhile I mean a few years. "Later." Later? What does later mean? "Then where are we going?" Now my curiosity is getting the better of me. "You do not question Lord Sesshomaru! Do you never learn?" I ignore Jaken's voice and look up expectedly at Sesshomaru-sama. He doesn't respond. I know he will because if not I will simply ask again. So I count silently to myself. By fifty I will ask again. Currently at 13. We are heading west. And I for one hope to see his home. I have been to his mother's house but not his. By the way "Lord Sesshomaru, how is your mother?" I haven't seen her since dying. She probably looks the same. "Stupid! Stupid! Don't ask Him about his mother. Lord Sesshomaru could care less." I know what will shut Jaken up. "Do you presume to know the mind of Lord Sesshomaru? Tell me, do you now speak for him?" I glance over my shoulder with honey sweet words. "No?" I mock. "Then shut up." I look forward again. I can feel Sesshomaru-sama's eyes cut to me. I'm at count 48. "Home." My eyes widen and I stop. A-Un runs into the back of me. Lord Sesshomaru keeps walking. Jaken mumbles after him. "Did you hear that A-Un?" I whisper softly. The shock has stolen my voice. "We are going home." I pause. "To Lord Sesshomaru's home." I am grinning like a fool now. A-Un nudges me. "I know, I know. Get moving." I am deliriously excited. I run as fast as I can to catch up. "Lord Sesshomaru." I really need to invest in some pants or a skirt because I can't run in this to save my life. I know he hears me because he tilts his head in my direction. When I fall in step with him again I speak up. "Lord Sesshomaru, I need to stop in a village and have a new kimono made." This is the first time I have asked for one so I wait with baited breath. Lord Sesshomaru says nothing but I know it means yes. He has a roundabout way of doing what I ask without ever acknowledge that he is doing as I ask. But hey, whatever works. All I know is that I will arrive at Lord Sesshomaru's palace in a brand new hand crafted kimono sometime next week.

Or at least I thought it would be next week. But you see, life has a funny way of sidelining your plans and causing you to change direction.


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

We came across a village finally. My anxiousness to get to Sesshomaru-sama's palace made the past four days seem endless. Not once did I try anything with my Lord. Attacking every day would be repetitious. I prefer to keep him on his toes. If such a thing was possible. The main road is about three carts wide and runs the length of the village down the middle. Homes stacked next to each other lined the road and even on the smaller roads that break off into different sections. The village is teeming to the brim with people going from here to there. Even I am repulse over how many people are crammed here so I know without even looking that Lord Sesshomaru must be seething. The noises must also be getting to him. Simple chattering with this many people has turned into a crescendo. I look nervously at my Lord. This is just the kind of thing to make him turn around and leave. I cannot afford to miss this opportunity even though I am no longer sure I want a kimono from a place like this. It is wrong for me to think that. There might be someone here who makes beautiful kimonos but you could never tell it by look at the people. They seem run down and poor. Not many of them are smiling and most are working. As we walk down the main road I see people are bartering with whatever they have. Food, clothes, animals, even services are for trade. Although I would hate to trade three days' worth of labor for one-night worth of a meal. But with this many people what can you do?

A stand with jewelry catches my eye as we wonder down one of the side roads. Quite a number of people are swarming this stand. I wonder why so I walk over to it. It has only four poles and linen hanging down the sides like a curtain. Lined on the table are rows of rings in various colors and sizes. I can't decide if I want to try the orange topaz or the light amethyst. Hanging above the rings is an arm littered with bracelets. I walk around the table to get a better look. The necklace captures Sesshomaru-sama's eyes perfectly. I absolutely must have it. It calls to my spirit like a siren. Begging me to come closer and pleading with me to take it. Hanging unpolished from a thin gold chain. The stone is about two fingers wide and looks to come to the second crease in my finger. I reach out to touch it carefully. The surface is cool to the touch. The necklace gently sways back and forth. That is odd because there is no breeze fluttering through. This doesn't dispel my curiosity though. "Beautiful isn't she?" A voice comes over my shoulder. So focused on the necklace I didn't even realize someone was standing so close to me. I wonder if it is because people are everywhere. I angle my body slightly to the right to look over my shoulder at him. I spy a young man who appears not older than I am. He has auburn hair and comes to my shoulders. A little on the thin side because his kimono seams to swallow him. It's the beady brown eyes that gives me pause. Maybe he is excited for a sell.

Whatever the reason I just want to get my necklace and get back to Lord Sesshomaru. I finally remember my manners after scrutinizing the guy. "Oh hello." I begin. "Yes the necklace is beautiful indeed." I glace back at the necklace. I swear it has my name written on it. Someone bumps into me from behind. Quick reflexes allow me to grab onto the table to keep from falling. I turn to see an old woman bowing towards me. "My apologies." "It's okay." I tell her but she doesn't stay to hear it. In fact, she quickly leaves and is replace by two more people shoving their way through. I feel like my Lord. I am over this village crawling with people. Too little space combined with too much noise and I'm starting to go crazy. The young man comes around the table. "Go on." He encourages me. "Try it on." I hesitate no further. I reach for the chain with my right hand. I use my left hand to cup the gem. I wonder what kind it is as I examine it closely. Even in this tent the stone shines brightly. I hasten to place it around my neck. My smile right now is wider than the ocean. I have completely fallen for it and I can't wait to show Lord Sesshomaru. It hangs in the cut of my kimono. "You know; it is completely stunning." When I look up from examining it the young man is helping someone else. I notice on the back of his neck is a spider. I shudder. Why in the world would you want a spider? I hate those things with a passion. I shout to be heard above the chaos. "I will be back. I have to get money from Lord Sesshomaru." My smile falters. Did he just stiffen up? He looks over at me with a smile that doesn't quite reach the eyes. "But of course." I brush off any weird feelings. A part because I care more about my new gift than his hesitance and mainly because Sesshomaru-sama tends to frighten daemons and humans alike. I leave to search for my Lord.

I know I couldn't have gotten far. With this many people it's impossible to go more than ten feet away. _Oh I see him._ It is easy to spot him. His silver hair stands out among all the black. I guess being an extra six inches taller than the next man doesn't hurt either. As I said finding him was easy. Getting to him, now that is the hard part. I push my way through about fifteen people. I can honestly admit that I gave up saying excuse me by person number eight. Being jostled back and forth isn't endearing me to anyone either. I try to get a grip on my emotions but I am used to the openness of the forest. Another ten people and I latch onto Lord Sesshomaru's arm. He looks at me as I use it to pull myself free of the throng of people. When I manage to straighten up I notice this area is less crowded. Almost as if people are obeying an unwritten rule of walking in a circle around my Lord. Whatever the reason I am grateful. Placing that from my mind I ask him giddy with excitement "Sesshomaru, may I have money to pay for my necklace?" Because let's face it. At this point it is mine! I stare at my necklace as I ask. Totally and completely prepared for a yes. I even go so far as to hold the necklace up for his appraisal. When I hear nothing longer than usual I look up. His eyes are so narrowed I wonder briefly if he can even see at this point. Lord Sesshomaru turns completely towards me and takes two steps. Two steps aren't a big deal into you take into account that he is invading my personal space. Not that I truly mind. _Can he smell that guy on me?_ I can't help but question. "He didn't touch me." I rush to assure him because that last time a man touched me didn't end to well. My Lord saved this man's life by purely accident. He just so happened to kill a daemon that was trying to eat the man. And in return the man ran over and hugged me with his thanks. That almost costed him the life he had just gotten back. Then Sesshomaru-sama ordered me to bathe. Twice. Hoping for no more repeats I just make sure he understands. "You didn't use an honorific when addressing Lord Sesshomaru! You human." Jaken is so irritating at times. I wonder why Lord Sesshomaru keeps him around. Hell why does he keep any of us around? Well, I know I am special but what about Jaken? The thought causes me to smirk. "So?" I carelessly answer Jaken. Sesshomaru-sama leans into my face. I try not to shrink back and stiffen my spine. Whatever makes me special needs to come into play right now. Because there will only be a few more times when I will be able to try my Lord.

I feel Lord Sesshomaru's hand at my neck. He fingers the jewelry. His knuckles brushing my neck cause a slow burn that rise to my cheeks. I hold perfectly still. This is the very first time that he has touched me without me being in immediate danger. "Don't you think it is beautiful?" I can barely get the words out of my dry throat. His eyes rise to mine. They drown me every time. And every single time feels like the first time. "It matches your eyes." I am stating the obvious but what else do I have to work with? I feel his hand wrap around the back of my neck. He pulls me closer. My body obey the silent command. _I cannot believe this!_ My eyes almost burst out of their sockets. Lord Sesshomaru has placed his head in the junction of my neck. "I know." Instantly my ear perks up when I hear Lord Sesshomaru's voice. I have no idea what he is talking about but his breath caresses my neck. "That is because it is mine." _Oh right! The necklace._ I gasp with the realization of what he means. "You can have it back." I stammer. I begin to reach around to unclasp the necklace when Lord Sesshomaru gasp my hand. "Leave it." "Are you sure? You can have it back. I don't even know how it ended up here." I rush to finish. "That is what I would like to know." Lord Sesshomaru straightens up and looks me in the eyes. I feel something brush my arm. Looking down I notice a brown spider on my kimono sleeve. I immediately squeak. "Ew!" I bat the spider away. "This place is too much." I sigh telling my Lord. I see another On the shoulder of someone passing by. Then another, over there in that woman hair. "Look. Sesshomaru. Over there." I point it out to him he turns to see. My eyes are getting wider by the second. My Lord Turns back to me. "Rin-" He is cut off by the screaming. On top of the roof is a SPIDER! The size of a dog! I scream.

I scream like a crazy person but I am so shock. Lord Sesshomaru grabs me around the waist and pulls me in between two builds just in time. Right where we were stand is a large glob of spider web. Two people got trapped. Lord Sesshomaru cups my check. "I'm alright." I don't know who I am trying to convince. A spider appears in the ally with us. Lord Sesshomaru goes to kill it with a green whip. "We need to get in a better place to fight." Lord Sesshomaru meets my eyes over his shoulder. "If you think I am running away think again." I am grossed out but I am no coward. We enter the streets again. Most of the people are fighting the spiders with farming tools or swords. The less fortunate ones are being eaten by the spiders. I stab one as I pass by. Stabbing the butt of a spider is the easiest considering it is so big. The hard part is getting behind one. I run over to save this little girl. Thankful I don't have to get right on it. My o tanto send out another pink beam killing three spiders. A-Un blast the spider behind me. I look around for my Lord. Eyes wide I see him on the roof fighting the mother spider. A large black sider with a woman coming out to the abdomen.

Shaking my head, I know I don't have time to stand around gawking. Another spider climbs onto the side of a house and shoots web at me. Holding up my o tanto a pink shield appears. I will have to tell Ayame next time I see her. Stabbing more spiders, I think _if I ever see her_. Jaken is over to my right blasting spiders and my back hits a wall. Wiping the sweat, I say "there is no end to them." I see a spider crawling down the wall to me I hold up my o tanto blasting it. Dashing away from the way I still get caught but the green guts. The more the spiders come that more tired I get. The onslaught is relentless. I feel like we walked into a nest or something. I run to get on A-Un. Someone started a fire on the perimeter of the village. A great idea to trap the spiders but one small factor is neglected. There are still people alive in the village. I jump down and rush to a group of humans crowding against the wall by four spiders. I slice two and three more rush over. "Dammit." Frustration is evident in more voice. I fight more of them losing patience. Finally, I free the people. "Run through the buildings to the right and into the forest. The village is swarming spiders and parts are on fire." Turning around to search for Jaken so we can get out of here.

A spider bites my arm and I cry out. Tears pooled in my eyes. It is so painful. I gasp and stab it in the face. "Die, you disgusting thing." It drops to the ground and I am swaying. Fire races up my left arm and I reach out blindly with my right. A-Un come to me. I try to focus but my eyes are blurry. My head is getting heavy and I stumble. "Rin. Tell me you are okay." I can hear Jaken talking but my swollen mouth doesn't allow for a cutting remark to come out. "Fine." Is all I can manage but what I thought was do I look fine? My legs are wobbling. I cannot take more than a few steps. I am leaning over the side of A-Un trying to catch my breathe. I swear I've run a thousand miles. _I am just going to stand here and rest my head for a second._ As I lay my head down I hear someone call me. Sounds so familiar but I don't move my head though. Closing my eyes, I thought I saw something white. It had to be an illusion because everything now is black.


	7. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

It is dark and warm. I like this better than the bright light. With the bright light comes pain. Pain that pools in my arm before shooting south to make my fingers tingle. The pain shoots north as well. Over my shoulder blade and down my chest. It steals my breath. But when it is black I feel nothing. Absolutely nothing. Something naggings at the back of my mind that I am forgetting. Whenever I reach out to grab it I am blinded by more pain. So instead I think I will lie here for a while. Wherever _here_ is. I settle comfortably in the recesses of my mind. Nothing can touch me here. Not the hunger pains I felt as a child. Not the aches in my feet when I developed blisters. I know I won't see new flowers bloom again. The vibrant colors or the fragrant smells. I won't splash in the rives as I catch fish. My heart hammers fast. Is it possible to feel like I'm running a race? Just around the corner I thought I found something. Something white. This white make my heart beat faster but strangely enough I feel no pain. I try to reach for it. I can't seem to gasp onto the memory that floats just beyond my reach.

I feel the wind rush by me and I duck against the strong currents. I am standing in a bizarre waste land. Everything is red. Red soil. Red sky. Red. Even a red river. I look around. Not a soul insight. I hear something behind me. I see the water lapping at the shore. I walk carefully to it. Wobbling a little. One would think that I haven't used my legs in years. Approaching I notice my reflection. My skin is pale. Worse than normal. Like I am carved out of marble. I have on a white sleeveless gown that reaches my ankles. My eyes are red. A deep crimson blood color. Oddly enough I am not shocked. What is shocking is the length of my hair. It is passed my waist. I can't believe it! I gently allow the hair to fall through my fingers. Glorious and soft. Healthy and thick. Every silver strand is perfectly defined. I gasp loudly. My hair is silver. And not just any kind of silver. My Lord's shade of silver. Still clutching my hair, I look up startled. Gasping again. Sesshomaru!

I see myself travel through my own eyes. Like being sucked through a vortex. This time when I am thrusted back into darkness I struggle to reach the surface but this black is thick and inky. It feels like swimming through tar. I struggle more because I know what is waiting for me on the other side. I have to get to Sesshomaru. I fight until I see the white light. _Dammit_. Gritting my teeth, I forgot about the pain. It comes rushing at me like a savage army. I try to with stand the force. It buckles my knees. "Rin." I can hear my Lord calling me. I could weep with joy. _I am here!_ I want to say but my lips won't move. Even worst is that my eyelids won't raise even though I am sure he is just beyond the surface. "Come to me Rin." It is all the strength I need to pull myself through.

On another gaps I awaken with mouth agape and eyes wide. I look around to the right. Nothing but trees. Night has fallen. Looking to the left I meet a wall of flesh. "Rin." On the sound of my name I clutch my left arm. Pain is inevitable. I am sitting in my Lord's lap. Cradled in right arm as he leans against the tree. Tears come to my eyes. His left hand reaches to lift my face. Halfway to his eyes I jerk my face out of his hand. I am in pain and on the brink of tears. Both, I know are signs of weakness. And weakness in front of my Lord is something I cannot allow. I stubbornly look down at my lap. Willing the pain to at least subside so that I can breathe. This time I feel his hand in my hair and I am forced to meet golden eyes. "Hai my Lord." I can barely choke out. I swallow as I feel it hit me again. His hand travels up my arm. A sensation soon follows. One I am not at all averse to. His hand travels up my neck to my face. I still.

Closing my eyes, I wait for a kiss that I know for sure has to be coming. I can feel it in my veins. On a cellular level. "You will be fine. Your muscles are still healing." A scarlet blush rushes cross my face as I realize how foolish I must look. Chancing a peek "Of course." I tense as I move to get up. My emotions are jumbled and I just want to get away. He stops me with an arm around my waist. "Let me up." My voice shakes and I look straight ahead. Not really seeing anything but it has to be better than looking to my left. I am most sure of it. He responds by settling me for fully into his lap. My head rest on his chest. His mokomoko settles around me. So soft. I imagine this is what a cloud must feel like. Tucking myself more carefully in his arms I lay my uninjured hand over his beating heart. Closing my eyes "for a moment there." I stop to try to keep from slipping underneath the black blanket that covers my mind. "I thought it was over." My breath evens. "I always protect what's mine." Returns to me.

I awoke to more pain. This time form being uncomfortable. The ache in your bones when you are sleeping wrong. I get up slowly. Sitting up I lick my dry lips. One end of the shirt falls off my shoulder. Reaching down I grab at it. I wonder why it is so big. After a few more tries I give up and let the shirt hang off. Feeling my lord shift beneath me I clutch his shoulders. Golden eyes greet me. "Morning Sesshomaru." I greet him cheerfully. He nods slowly. "How are your injuries?" "Better." A smile breaks out onto my face. I am very happy to see him. Could have sworn that I was dying. I wrap my arms around his neck. Burying my head in his shoulder, I hold him close. "Thank you Sesshomaru." I tell him. So very grateful to have him. I feel his arms wrap around my waist holding me close. I pull back slightly to look in his eyes. I know mine must reflect how long and how deep I have loved him. Taking a deep breath, I do what I should have done a while ago. My left hand runs through his hair at the nape of his neck. I kiss my lord. Closing my eyes, I enjoy the feel of his lips on mine. I know he has to be surprised yet I keep going. I only pull back when I begin to run out of air. Lifting up a little I look at him. Quite satisfied with my handy work. I smile like a crazy person and try use his shoulder to get up. Imagine my surprise when I feel Sesshomaru's hand in my hair and on my waist as he yanks me back down. Sesshomaru doesn't take the intuitive often. I want to do a happy dance but I am too occupied.

I push his shoulders back when I realize that I am suffocating. I pull back grudgingly. Catching my breath, I stand up. When I see his reaching out for me, I side step him. I turn around quickly and go to A-Un because I don't want him to see me blush. "I am going to take a bath." I tell him while rummaging through my things. Some of what I am feeling is nerves but majority is satisfaction. Still digging through my orange satchel I hear "Rin." "I will only be a minute." I respond. I am trying to locate a hair tie or ribbon. Now that I think about it I should probably wash my hair. There is no telling how long I was out. "Rin." I am blocking out that voice. It is like a siren and getting closer. I refuse to give in. Sesshomaru is standing behind me now. His arms on either side of me. Resting on A-Un. "Rin." It floats like a butterfly to my left ear. His head must be over there. I lick my dry lips and close my eyes. I utter nothing. No other words will suffice for a moment like this and I cannot think of anything witty anyway. He steps closer to breathe in my scent. "You are running." Not a question bit it demands an answer anyway. I turn around and look my lord in his eyes. So brilliantly beautiful. "Not running my lord." Not exactly lying but not telling the truth either. I state with a calm voice. I reach up and peck his lips. I will never tire of this so long as I live. I head south towards the river. A-Un following all the way.

Taking my clothes off by the river I notice something familiar and alien to me at the same time. I am not wearing my kimono. Not even my Haneri. In fact, I am wearing Sesshomaru's shirt! A scarlet blush races across my face as I remember back to the campsite. He was shirtless when he cornered me by A-Un. He was shirtless when he kissed me. Even more startling is that I slept in his arms while wearing his shirt. I clutch it to my chest with both hands. It smells like him. I drop it. Startled even more. That means Sesshomaru saw me naked! No going back now. I grab the last of my liquid soap and head towards the river. I wash my body and my hair. Taking my time to ensure I am truly clean. Getting a seat after I dry off and put on clothes, notice that I still have my necklace. I stop combing my hair to reach for it. Still as captivating as the first time I saw it. Its beauty overshadows the ugliness that followed once I found it. I wonder where I was when I saw my reflection in the river. I still can't get the imagine of having silver hair and red eyes out of my head. I wonder if it is something I secretly desire. Not the red eyes but to have long silver hair. To have golden eyes. I get up and wade into the water. Pulling my orange kimono up to my knees, I look at my reflection. My reflection shows someone who is healthy and happy. Someone who is so close to having all that she dreams of. The longer I stare into the water the more my reflection changes. I see the woman I am and more importantly the woman I want to be. She is compassionate, honest, and loyal. The woman looking back at me is exquisite. She also looks how I long to look and it is that look that captivates me. "Come on Rin." Jaken calls to me breaking me out of my trans fixation.

As we are walking I eat an apple. I prefer the green ones to the red ones ever since Kagome told me the story about winter. I guess a queen gave her a bad apple to kill her. Lord Sesshomaru told me not to worry, that he would kill the queen but ever since then I eat strictly green apples. As I munch I think again about Kagome and Inuyasha. I know that I should visit them soon. Besides of running low on supplies and wanting to her pup, there is a lot I need to ask her. Someone above must really be listening to me because ahead in the clearing is Inuyasha and Kagome. Dropping my apple, I rush to Kagome as she rushes to me. We hug in the middle and exchange greetings. While still holding her arms I tell her that I need to speak with her. She nods her understanding. We break apart as Inuyasha and Sesshomaru-sama joins us. "Hey Inuyasha." "Sup Rin." I smile when Kagome elbows him in the stomach. "Err, I mean how you been Rin?" I laugh a little. Some things never change. "We were just coming to look for you." Inuyasha tells Lord Sesshomaru. I silently plead with him to play nice. As nice as he is capable of. "No need as we are here." "And I am happy to see you guys." I smooth over. I speak for myself because I know no one else is happy to see them. As long as one doesn't insult the other they can be in the same place as the same time. Inuyasha turns to head in the direction they just came from. Kagome links arms with me. "So tell me how it's going with Sesshomaru-sama." I have no idea why she is whispering because they can still hear us. I look over my left shoulder to see my lord looking over to his left. I scan the trees and see nothing. My focus returns to Kagome as she pulls me along.

We all sit around the kotatsu at Kagome's home. Sesshomaru and I with our backs to the wall and facing the door. Ayame is to my left. I guess this is where she went after she left me. Next to her is Shippo. To my right and across from Ayame is Miroku and Sango. Sango is hitting Miroku in the back of his head. You would think after five years of marriage he would learn. Minako is five and Nara is two. Miroku is quite fond of his daughters. Says he does nothing but attract women. Maybe he is just lucky because you have a 49% chance of having a girl, and a 24% chance of have a second girl. I only know this because she and Miroku were arguing about it last time I was here. Speaking of Kagome, her and Inuyasha are sitting directly across the table from Sesshomaru and I. They have a pup named Hiroyuki. Meaning widespread happiness. I wanted to name him Kazuhiro which means first harmonious prince. Inuyasha picked Takashi, praiseworthy. We were both vetoed. Me by Sesshomaru who scoffed at the idea that Inuyasha's child could be royalty. Inuyasha was vetoed by Kagome saying "I'd rather my child be happy than praised." I can still see her hands on her hips. Yuki is seven and Kagome and Inuyasha have been married for ten years now. Something about not giving him her cookies without a ring. I asked Sesshomaru-sama why Kagome would sell her cookies instead of just sharing them. He immediately said something to Inuyasha that made him hang his head. The children are with Yori right now.

I reach for the tea Kagome passes me. "Oh, how beautiful." She tells me. I look down. "Oh my necklace. I love it too. Just got it yesterday. Or at least I think it was yesterday." "You think it was yesterday?" I hear the question and see the worry in her eyes. "Uh yeah. My days are running together." Not wanting to say too much. "Okay." Kagome says. She settles back but I know she still has questions. It's Inuyasha that doesn't hold back. "How do your days run together? Either it was yesterday or it wasn't." My head swings to Inuyasha. He can be so insensitive at times. "I swear! I should have never taken the necklace off of you." Kagome hits Inuyasha in the back of his head. "It's okay. Tell us when you are ready Rin." Sango. Ever the diplomat. "It's okay." I say more for Sesshomaru-sama's benefit than my own because he looks two seconds away from jumping the table and strangling Inuyasha. I proceed to tell them what happen. Not everything. Just the stuff at the village. "Oh wow." Ayame leans into me. "So that necklace is Sesshomaru's and it came from his palace?" Even I am impressed with that fact. "Apparently." I shrug. Everyone is captivated by my necklace. Well everyone but Sesshomaru of course.

"So the spiders came out of nowhere?" Leave it to Sango to bring the meeting back around. "Seems that way. Wouldn't you say Lord Sesshomaru?" I turn towards him to gauge his response. "Maybe the spiders need food." Shippo replies. "And that is why they attacked the village. You said it had to have hundreds of people." "I think she was over exaggerating a bit." Kagome throws in. "I've been to some really busy cities and trusts me when I say, there is no way hundreds of people could have been there." She states this so calmly but I know what I saw. "Besides if some many people were there. Why not just make the village larger? Or why didn't people leave who couldn't find work?" "Not everyone can just pick up and leave Inuyasha." The way she puts emphasis on Inuyasha's name irritates him. "Well, Kagome, since you know it all why don't you tell us?" As they go back and forth Miroku gets dragged in which cause Sango and Shippo to get dragged in. I chance a glance at Sesshomaru-sama. He looks bored. Ayame is staring at me. Why? I am not sure. When she notices that I am looking she looks away quickly. Honestly that makes it even more suspicious.

"Right Rin?" "Oh what?" I look at Sango. "I said that spiders attacked the village on purpose and they even had a spider queen." "Yea it does seem that way and they did have her. Such an ugly thing at that." I am not superficial but there is beauty and then there is hideousness. I make sure that my eyes don't cut to Sesshomaru every time I think of beauty. "When was the first time you saw the spiders?" "She saw it on the shoulder of a guy." Inuyasha cuts Miroku off. "Actually, I first saw the spider in the forest. One crawled onto my sleeve. But this one was regular size." I answer Miroku's question. "So what you are saying is-" Kagome is cut off. Jaken comes flying through the door. "Come quick milord." He is huffing. "The spiders are back." My eyes widen. Within seconds everyone springs into action and grab their respective weapons. I reach for mine and proceed to the door. Since lord Sesshomaru and I were in the back of the room we will be the last to leave. Before I make it out of the door Sesshomaru-sama grabs me. "You will stay." He places himself between me and the door. I don't move when he leaves closing the door behind him. I am certainly not going to be obedient, just giving him a head start is all. After counting to ten I try the door only to find it locked. _Dammit!_


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

I try the door again. I cannot believe that he had the nerve to lock me in. _I am going to kill him._ I think with anger boiling. _The nerve, the audacity._ I raise my fist and bang on the door. "Hey." I yell. "Let me out of here." I bang some more until my fist hurts. Looking around wildly I try to find another way out. _Think Rin think._ I run my hands through my hair. I can hear people yelling outside. Not distinctive words but voices. I search my mind for something that will help me.  
 _I've got it._ I close my eyes. Breathing deeply, I raise my otanto. Pointing it at the door I exhale. I don't know the words to say but I imagine what I want done. I feel the air around me begin to change. I hold my arm out steady. A loud boom and crash can be heard. I open my eyes and cheer. I've done it! There is a gaping hole in the wall behind me. I realize that this wasn't me. I have no time to discover who was kind enough to let me out. A spider has come in with pieces of the wall. I blast it one good time.

The scene before me has my eyes wide and my jaw lowered. White balls are in the village by the homes and some are in the trees. The people in this village are more prepared than those in the last village. They have real weapons to fight with and some are pretty good. A woman to left lops off three legs of a spider jumping towards her. She has such grace in the way she moves. Hair flying around her. It is a sight to see. This one has been trained by Sango. The villagers call out to one another cheering each other on with every victory. They don't know that there is more to come. Some villagers haven't made it and others are covered in guts and blood. The stench is powerful. Churning my stomach. The sun is setting panting the sky like a canvas. Reds, oranges, and yellows provide the perfect back drop to this chaos. A white ball in my line vision shakes and a spider breaks through. My eyes widen. These aren't balls. No they're eggs. _This just keeps getting better and better._

I blast the new spider. Another egg to my left starts to shake. I stab at it. Does nothing but open it up. Killing that spider, I look up to see Shippo with his fox fire. I round the house that I was in. Blasting as I go, I make a bee line for A-Un. Three spiders chase Kagome off to the side. I know Inuyasha can't be too far from his wife. I look for the source of my ire. None other than Lord Sesshomaru. Skidding to a stop I see Sesshomaru-sama up ahead fighting the spider boy. Only this time he has a large spider attached to his back. Its legs shoot out like arms in every direction preventing anyone from getting too close. I duck as Sango's boomerang comes flying through. Two spiders rush me. Blasting them I call out to Kagome. "I need to know how to better use my weapon." She purifies the spiders around her and teaches me a chant.

"That should take care of any of them in a mile radiance. Here, do it with me and we can expand the perimeter." She runs over to me. We dodge the leaf storm Ayame is creating. Leaves fly past my head. I look to Kagome and when she nods I let loose a beam and she an arrow. Ayame come through with another leaf storm. Hers wasn't planned but perfect timing. In a five-mile radiance spiders explode. We cheer and high five. "Yes Kagome. We did it." I am so excited. I turn towards Lord Sesshomaru to give him the good news. My face drops when I see him. He is holding the guy by the throat but one of the spider legs has stab him in the back. I run towards them. "No. No no no no. This can't be happening." I say in disbelief. I drop my otanto to pick up the bottom of my kimono. Running faster I try to get there as soon as possible.

I hear voices on both sides of me calling out to me but I can't stop. He is hurt. Lord Sesshomaru is hurt. I see Inuyasha behind the boy ripping the spider off his back. Sesshomaru-sama looks over at me. He is angry but I could care less. When I reach him, Sesshomaru flings the boy towards Miroku. Turning towards me his eyes are blazing. I am not worried because my fear has turned into anger as well. "You're hurt." I begin. "Didn't I tell you to stay put?" "I am not your dog Sesshomaru. And how dare you lock me in?" I point an accusing finger at him. Still breathing hard, I huff a bit. He takes measured steps towards me. I could care less about his attitude because I have one of my own. "Rin." That deadly quite irks. "Don't Rin me." My voice is rising. I can hear Sango telling me to calm down but all I can focus on is my heart racing.

Lord Sesshomaru approaches me one step at a time. "This is just a big misunderstanding." "Oh no." I tell Inuyasha. "He is the one with the misunderstanding. But today we will straighten this out." I never take me eyes from Sesshomaru-sama. My necklace grows hot. I reach for it with my left hand. Sesshomaru stops in front of me. "Straightening you say." He raises an eyebrow. Before I get another word out Lord Sesshomaru grabs my upper right arm and begins to drag me off. "Uh. Sesshomaru?" Inuyasha steps forward. Kangome puts a hand on Inuyasha shoulder. "Fuck off." My eyes widen to the point where I thought they would pop out of my head. _Did my Lord just curse?_ I look over at him. He has the most serious expression as he drags me along. I chance a look back. Everyone is stunned. Before I am completely out of sight I see Miroku still has the boy.

The necklace in my palm pulses. I look down to see that it has turned blood red. I gasp in surprise. Wanting to tell my lord I look up to find him shoving me against a tree. Being handled like this leaves me with mix feelings. I settle for righteous indignation. "Have you lost your mind?" I glare. "Don't push me Rin." His voice stills me. The hand on my arm snakes up to my hair. His other hand settles on my waist. He moves me more firmly against the tree and takes another step. My hand rises to his chest. I don't have the strength to push him away, so I grip his shirt. "Sesshomaru-sama." I say nervously. "Don't. Not when I am this close to breaking." His nose is in my neck, giving me shivers down my spine.

"I want you to break." I take a deep breath to continue. "I am not a defenseless little girl anymore." His hand tightens on my waist. I know I have his undivided attention. "Sesshomaru-sama." I begin. There really was no need to because seconds later I feel his lips on mine. Pure bliss flows through every cell in my body. I want to shout with joy but I am using what little oxygen I have left. Our lips break for a little, the hand in my hair angles my head, and then he kisses me a second time. More prepared this time I snake my hands up his arms and around his neck. I pull him closer. I feel more than hear him growl. This is what heaven feels like. I could float away. My need for oxygen causes me to push my lord back.

"Wow." I am breathing hard. Chest rising and falling. I push my hair back and lick my lips. Sesshomaru-sama is breathing hard as well. His eyes drown me. Both of his hands rest on the tree above my head. He leans in closer. "I am serious Sesshomaru." His eyes narrow. _Oh you thought I forgot? Well I didn't._ I don't voice my thoughts. He straightens and takes a few steps back. His eyes finally turn gold as emotions calm. "You could have been hurt." His concern is touching. He uncharacteristically runs a hand through his hair. "You mean like you were." I straighten up from the tree as well. "I am NOT human." I know he didn't mean it like that but it burns nonetheless. "Yes. Well that is why I asked for proper training. I refuse to run anymore." He eyes me cautiously. "From anything or anyone." I finish. I am throwing down the gauntlet by challenging him but what do I have to lose?

Immediately I am shoved against the tree again. My head is protected by him cupping the back of my head. I gasp in shock. Reaching out, I grab his arms to steady myself. "You could have been hurt." The quietness in his voice causes me to look up into his eyes. He looks like he is struggling on the inside. I stand on my tip toes so that I can reach his neck. Pulling him down I whisper against his lips "stop fighting." Then I kiss Lord Sesshomaru with emotions I have shoved deep for years. This time Sesshomaru pulls me against him. I wince when I come into contact with his armor. He lets me go abruptly. Reaching his claps, he drops the armor to the ground. Steeping over it he comes to me. I send a quick thank you prayer to whatever god that seems to smile down at me.

My heart beats fast as I make a spit decision to run. I duck under his arm and dash to the next tree. Night has fallen but I don't care. Soon my eyes will adjust. Not to the sight of my lord's but better than most humans. "Good going Rin." I say with a smile on my face. Facing me fully Sesshomaru ask me "you think this is funny?" I raise an eyebrow. "Hilarious!" I squeak because before I can finish the word I am moving to avoid getting caught. Dashing in and out of more trees my laughter and heavy breathing cause me to hiccup. This only makes me laugh more. I press my back against another tree. I take deep breaths to slow my heart rate. "Rin." I hear from the right so I run to the left. Through two trees and around a third I hide. "If you come out I will go easy on you." "I doubt it Sesshomaru." I dart to another tree.

"If you want me then come and get me." I laugh as I make for yet another tree. Before I reach it the world spins around me and I feel the tree against my back. I grin like a fool. Feeling his hands on my waist, I grab onto his arms. His hands slide down the back of my thighs and then he lifts me up. "Sesshomaru!" Is all I can manage to get out. He backs me up against the tree. Steeping in between my legs he kisses me again. This high up makes me delirious. I run my fingers through his hair and kiss him with everything I got.


End file.
